You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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