Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I would ride that face into the sunset
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
