Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
