the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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