marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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