Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
