i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
