he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Randomize