Non-Jews are for practice
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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