Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize