why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
