His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
