He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
