My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
