6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
