Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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