I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
