did you get engaged???
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
