u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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