:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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