new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
