you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
