My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Randomize
