the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
