Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I understand Curling. That high.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
