Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
