Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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