she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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