Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I party with great urgency now.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
