UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
