hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Randomize
