Midget sex pt 2 tonight
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
