He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
