do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize