Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
false alarm, still single
Randomize
