So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize