she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Who died my cat blue again?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
