May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
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