How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
