Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Randomize
