She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
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