great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize