Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
it's like iHOP with fire
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
