My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
