he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
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