Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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