She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
