How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
