You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
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