i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
