u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
