I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
